Have you ever met someone who told you their name…and you promptly forgot it? That has happened too many times to me. Guess what? I probably wasn’t really listening. Steven Covey once wrote, “Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.” Ouch! That hits home.

If I am trying to come up with my next comment or response, I’m not listening carefully to the person in front of me. G. K. Chesterton pointed out the problem when he said, “There’s a lot of difference between listening and hearing.”

Most great leaders are good listeners. They are genuinely interested in the person they are talking to, and they give them full attention. For most of us, that is a trait that must be cultivated.

Steve Gutzler has become a friend of our MEDIAlliance ministry, and he specializes in helping leaders become more effective as they serve others. Steve recently pointed out the value of listening in our role as leaders. He says:

  • It shows ultimate respect.
  • It builds trust.
  • It grows your relationships.
  • It increases your knowledge.
  • It generates the best solutions.
  • It fosters ironclad loyalty.

It improves your reputation.

OK…those are the benefits. Now, how do we become better listeners? Here are some of Gutzler’s suggestions:

  1. Look intently at the individual. Give the other person your undivided attention.
  2. Do not interrupt. Give people time to express themselves.
  3. Identify your emotions. Don’t just react. Reign in your emotions and just listen.
  4. Suspend judgment. Wait to hear the whole story before responding. If you interrupt you may miss the most important thing they intended to say.
  5. Ask questions for clarity. People will see you care and will be even more open.

James writes about this in his New Testament letter:

Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.

James 1:19

I like the way the Amplified version expands on this instruction:

Understand this, my beloved brothers and sisters. Let everyone be quick to hear [be a careful, thoughtful listener], slow to speak [a speaker of carefully chosen words and], slow to anger [patient, reflective, forgiving]; …

Steve Gutzler recommends you set up appointments with a team member or two this week. Work at giving them undivided attention and listen at least two-thirds of the time. Then…see how they respond. You may be surprised by the impact.

God’s best…